Waiting is hard.
There are things that I desire in my heart that as much as I would love those things to happen, it’s quite clear that God knows I am not ready for them yet. He knows that if it were to happen right now, at this moment, I would probably overwhelm myself or something. I cannot deny though that these desires, which have building up in me for a while now, aren’t difficult to push away sometimes, but the fact of the matter is God’s will surpasses my own will.
What if God doesn’t want this to happen in my lifetime or at all? Then, I would’ve spent my entire time waiting for something to happen instead of being content in what God’s already provided me with.
It’s incredibly difficult and I feel as though I’ve been tested a LOT in this area when it comes to these things.
There are a lot of things up in the air right now, but God is doing so many more things that I can see and I cannot see. I may not know how all of this is going to turn out, but I know that He is with me. Jesus is leading me and lighting my pathway.
Other people have been given with these things without even trying and I’ve been really tempted to compare myself with them. But the fact of the matter is God knows what’s best for me. My testimony and my life is not going to be identical to theirs. God has something planned for me and has a purpose designed for me. I pray that I may fulfill His purpose for me in my life.